Wednesday, March 16, 2011

New York Dating...

As some of you may know, I am a recent Brooklyn Transplant hailing from the great state of California. And while I will always hold a fondness of my home back in socal, I know that New York is where I need to be. So after I made the decision to give all of my shit away and start living, I found myself here with nothing more than some good friends and a hope for a happier life.

Through the world's grace and support of others, I landed on my feet with nowhere to go but forward. Along the path of self discovery, I have come to certain realizations about myself and have made vast improvements in my life. I honestly cant remember the last time I have been at so much peace with myself. But like anyone, I also crave the companionship of others. I am a lover and have a lot of it to give. So in order to find a means of expressing all of this love, I have entered the vast and complicated, sometimes brutal world of New York Dating.

Since I am new here, taking the route of online dating seemed to be the right choice for me. I currently have a profile on OkCupid and I honestly have no qualms about it. In fact, I encourage you to check out my profile @

Through the series of dates that I have been on, I have begun to find myself gaining tons of inspiration. And so my first love letter is dedicated to anyone whom I have dated via this site.

Dear Y factor,
You know, at the end of the day, 
all I really want is someone to talk to. 
I want to feel like I am important enough... 
and special special and precious enough 
to want to make time for.
 I want someone to be there for me. 
Someone to pick up the phone when I call. 

I am constantly that "Rad Girl" 
who... for whatever reason, 
does not make the cut.
I don't know why I'm telling you this. 
But I guess its because.. 
you are the first person I connected with 
after years of being ignored. 
And since then, it has been a whirlwind 
of first dates and missed opportunities. 

It has been a long time since I searched 
for someone else to fill my empty gaps. 
I was always the only one I could count on to be there for me. 
I know how to be independent. 
But putting my heart into the hands of the world 
has again proven it to be a brutal place.
And yet I risk it because I honestly want to feel that possible joy 
of someone wanting... needing to fulfill me.
Not by making me their number one priority, 
but simply by answering the phone...
whenever, if ever, I call.

The girl you left hanging. 

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